Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Where am I in life?

I ask myself the above question at least twice a week. I don't do it with wishes or regrets in mind. I do it to make sure I'm on track. I attended a training class on time management and one of the things the instructor had was her goals written on paper. There's something about having them written that makes them real, she said.
It got me thinking - and I get to really thinking about things when I'm on vacation. I decided that I'm going back to school - because my first time around, things didn't go as planned. I went to Boston University - it was an ok school. I wasn't really prepared to face what I did there. I'm big into academic integrity and by that I mean actually doing the work, studying hard and getting a good grade - not spending all my free time, buttering up my TA's for questions on the exams. I also think that grading on the curve completely sucks. It was way too big - I came from a tiny private girls' school in Midtown Manhattan...Dominican Academy - graduated with 44 girls. I would venture to say that many of them graduated college and some even completed their advanced degrees. Some of my former classmates are now doctors, nurses, financial analysts, physical therapists, organic farmers, magazine editors - by no means as underachieved as myself, an Assistant Branch Manager. And while Massasoit Community College is a far cry from where some of my classmates graduated: Fordham, NYU, Harvard, Barnard, Columbia University - I'm gonna at least get my two year degree and take it from there.

While on vacation, I also think about my home life. I'm married - have been now for 8 years, to quite possibly the best man on this side of the planet. He's the best thing that has ever happened to me. Together, we have the best 3 kids anyone could possibly wish for. I looked at my calendar and saw that one of my childhood friends (and Angelica's godfather) is getting married (finally) in less than 2 weeks. My best friend from high school (and Melody's godmother) is getting married in March - she just had a baby in July (I'm little Claire's godmother - she'll be christened in Novemeber). My other friend from high school, who has been married longer than me, is having baby #4 (any day now if she hasn't had it already).

Life is so full - so rich - so good for pictures....

That's my newest goddaughter - Claire Paige. She's so cute - she liked me....gave me a kiss - she was probably rooting to nurse (sorry, baby - these girls are dry wells - go find your mother).

These are Claire's parents, Mike and Agnes (whom I affectionately call Booger - it's a high school nickname and no, it didn't evolve from a nose residue incident, just a spelling debate). She will probably kill me because I took this photo 4 days after she had the baby and 2 days since she had slept more than 15 minutes at a time. She told me that if I had any pictures of the 3 of them where they didn't look like shit I could post them...I think she looks fantastic after having a baby 4 days ago - heck, you can tell that she showered that day (I can't remember how long it was until I took a shower after having the babies - I mean, I did at the hospital and then when I came home, I just can't recall!!) This picture was taken with auto flash - I had to - it was too dim to take the picture without suffering from camera shake. Camera shake is inevitable when your shutter speed is less than 1/50sec - even if you are completely still, your blood flow can cause camera shake at less than 1/50sec. I didn't bring my tripod so I cheated and used my flash...still a great picture...I don't think it was their first family portrait (I didn't make it to the hospital) but it makes me happy to see them together.

According to the timeline of my life compared to my friends' lives - I married pretty early at 23. Had my first baby at 24. Had my second baby at 25. Bought at house at 26. Had my last baby at 28. Some of my friends are in their late 20's/early 30's having their first or second kids; some married, some not. Some have achieved much personal growth in their careers that I strive for everyday. Some have their advance degrees and no families of their own - yet. We've all taken many different paths with many different results.

I love my path - I love that I can steer my way through my path - I love where this path has brought me today - I love that this path is long and scenic and that stops along the way help me to grow and shine. I just need to make sure that I stop and take more pictures of my path...hope to post more this weekend - gotta go school shopping - all I have gotten so far is a notebook - and that one is for me.

1 comment:

Michelle McGee said...

Congratulations on going back to school.

I did not realize our amazing similarities until now... I graduated from a small private all girls high school, too. And whenever there is a prize for smallest class size, I always win!

I went to Northeastern and it killed me. Small fish, huge pond.

It was tough, lots of changes, but finally, finally graduated (and beyond) with the academic integrity you speak of. (I like that phrase, I'll be using it again.)

Good luck on your path.